You’re Not Being Pushed Away From Compassion, You’re Choosing to Run

Of course vegans are passionate. Of course vegans are frustrated. Of course vegans speak out. 

And yes, that makes people uncomfortable.

We reevaluated the ways our culture taught us to thoughtlessly and repeatedly use, abuse, and kill animals. We learned the extent of the environmental destruction from this industry and decided we still kind of want a planet to live on. Now we ask, beg, and plead for you to do likewise: to examine your impacts and not just blindly follow the harm your culture has taught you. 

And most of you ignore us. Many even mock us. Simply for caring. 

But through the mocking, through the dismissal and the frustration, we speak anyway. It shouldn’t be surprising that, for some of us, this comes off as anger at your refusal to stop the harm you are causing. And so, on top of being ignored and ridiculed for our choices, we are collectively viewed as being pushy or preachy. And sure, some of us are, because it is hard to sit quietly and watch the unrelenting outrage taking place. 

But trust me, some of you think we are pushy just for existing.

People do not like thinking their choices are wrong or harmful. Human nature makes self-examination of any perceived flaws uncomfortable. Even stating you are vegan often brings defensiveness from a meat eater. When choices are ethically different, you either have to defend your choices or dismiss the other position, even within your own head. And it is easier to dismiss. To think we are unreasonable. To think we are silly, angry, or pushy. 

The strangest part is that this push to quiet us, to calm us, comes from the progressives, the same ones who shout loudly for other social justice issues. The ones we stand with in our shared quests for justice and equality.

We wouldn’t demand subtle politeness in our struggle for equal rights. We don’t tell people standing up against sexism that they should be less bold or they’ll turn people away from the cause. We don’t ask those who fight for LGBTQ rights to be calm and gentle and wait for gradual transitions to acceptance. 

Yet, when it comes to veganism, we are told to be calm and quiet, while millions die every hour.

We wouldn’t ask for compromise in these fights for justice, past or present.

Would we have been content if half of the slaves were set free? Perhaps we would have celebrated allowing only one-third of women to vote? Maybe people could be slightly less sexist, when the mood strikes. Perhaps they could not harass on Wednesdays (that’s better than harassing every day, right?). Maybe they could bake cupcakes for a gay couple instead of a wedding cake, or issue a civil union license if the idea of marriage bothers them. Maybe we could agree to have only one child separated per family at the border.

If we would not accept these policies of compromise on justice and equality, why would you expect someone else to accept compromise in their struggles for justice just because the victims aren’t important to you? Why should vegans be content with partial gains, a slight reduction in your harm? Why can’t we simply say that causing unnecessary harm is wrong, without your claiming we are elitist for believing our opinion is the right one? 

When has causing unnecessary harm to others been the right decision? Sure, there are times it has been legal, but when has it ever been right?

We are allowed to think it is wrong to kill animals. We don’t have to legitimize your claim that it is fine to kill them, that it is your “personal choice.”

We know we are “right” in believing one shouldn’t be a racist, sexist, homophobic, anti-immigrant asshole, even if one can make the “personal choice” to be exactly that. We don’t have to whisper our dissent. We don’t have to say “well maybe you could consider not doing that so much, pretty please.” We can loudly and proudly support the rights and lives of all humans. We should be able to do so for non-humans as well.

Yelling is certainly not my preferred method of discussion and awareness. And I agree there are more effective methods, but subtle hints are too easy for you to ignore and lives are literally on the line.

While there are some facts meat eaters might truly not know (the rainforest destruction, the pollution, the greenhouse gas emissions, the shrinkage of the food supply), it is hard to say someone (beyond the age of maybe eight) doesn’t know they are killing animals to eat them. 

The most frustrating part about being vegan isn’t having to inform people of the harm that comes from their choices but that even when people are informed, most of them still have no interest in making changes. 

The only reason people claim they won’t go vegan “because vegans are pushy” is because they didn’t want to be vegan in the first place. It is an excuse to avoid examining the argument so they can continue guilt-free with their current choices.

Male infant circumcision, like meat eating, has been a cultural norm, widely accepted by the majority of the population for years. But there certainly are, and have been, dissenters. If someone was standing outside a hospital yelling that circumcision was cruel and unnecessary and the right choice was to not circumcise your child, no one would think, “Well, I’m definitely circumcising my baby now because this guy is pushy.” Maybe we would wonder what the concern was, how harm could be involved with this choice. Maybe we wouldn’t want to learn from the man who was yelling. Maybe we wouldn’t care to hang out with him at pot-lucks. But we might want to know so we could come to our own conclusions. So we use the internet and/or get input from trusted friends or professionals and make our own informed decision. But we don’t make the choice in direct opposition to the guy screaming his head off, just because we found him rude.

People aren’t joining a vegan cult or a vegan church. They don’t have to socialize with vegans. We’re just asking that they choose some rice and beans and cashews and clementines and save some animals, and maybe still save the planet too. 

Sure, I’ll still offer you love. I’ll try to speak with kindness and understanding. I’ll try to remember that I too once thought differently, but that doesn’t mean I have to accept your choice to cause harm to others. I have the right to dissent, with or without your blessing.

Whether or not you want to listen, whether or not your sensibilities are offended, whether we are polite or rude, and whether we are whispering or shouting, it’s still the right choice. Because your choice isn’t personal when it has victims.

11 Sep 2019

This is a response to the "vegans are pushy" responses to this amazing NYT article: Stop Mocking Vegans